I think the pic and the happiness on my face speaks for itself. I have a hard and I mean HARD time leaving the grocery store or any store for that matter without one. The combo of smooth milk chocolate and creamy peanut butter makes more sense to me than PB & J (don't get it twisted I love those too:) Yep 230 of my calories go to these sinful decadent treats and honestly it's hard to stop.
Then there are the other ones I picked up in life. Working as a high end conference center server I gained a love for all things exotic and decadent. Things I could only have at work or at super great restaurants rarely or just things I didn't ordinarily eat the number one vice was paella.
Paella (IPA: [pa'eʎa]) is a rice dish which originated in the Spanish Autonomous Community of Valencia near lake Albufera, a lagoon in eastern Spain.[1] Spaniards consider paella to be one of their national dishes.
There are three widely known types of paella: Valencian paella (Spanish: paella valenciana), seafood paella (Spanish: paella de marisco) and mixed paella (Spanish: paella mixta); but there are many others as well. Valencian paella consists of white rice, green vegetables, meat, snails, beans and seasoning. Seafood paella replaces meat and snails with seafood and omits beans and green vegetables. Mixed paella is a free-style combination of meat, seafood and sometimes beans.
The varieties of rice used are usually Calasparra[2][3] or Bomba[3]. Other key ingredients include saffron, and olive oil.
This dish has gained considerable popularity throughout most of the Spanish-speaking world, including the Hispanic regions of the United States. It also enjoys moderate popularity throughout Western Europe.
Thanks wikipedia!
anywho, this, Coke Zero, bruschetta on petit toast, giardineria, a great steak, homemade buttermilk ranch dressing, anything that combines mint and chocolate, a good Merlot, a great chardonnay, good Mexican food, and just unabashed food decadence are my trigger points. They immediately bring me to this happy, euphoric state. And then afterwards..it all comes crumbling down.
That's when I start to think and ask myself questions: How long do I really want to be the fat girl? How long do I want to buy my clothes in the higher end of the plus size section? How long do I want to have aches and pains that just aren't common for a 27 year old woman? How long do I want to be UNHEALTHY???
So I struggle with those addictions everyday, because they are the gates that separate me from my healthy body. I'm trying to move closer to my new found loves: roasted zucchini, portobella mushrooms, and eggplant, strawberry yogurt and granola, Greek salads, and egg whites with salsa. My addictions wont stop me from being as thin and healthy as I want to be they will just make getting there that much sweeter.
I've been away from my family for over 9 years...so homemade mexican food is a weakness, theres some tamales sitting in my fridge right now because I found a lady that makes them every week and sales them. Like you, I found that I'm asking myself "is it really worth it?"
ReplyDeleteThere's some things that make it hard for me to remember that I eat to live, not live to eat.
I think it's vital that on this journey we pinpoint our weaknesses and literally objectify it as you have ... to compare ... all that is holding us back ... against where we want to be ... and continously remind ourselves that it's really NOT worth it ... wonderful post!
ReplyDeleteAh yes,
ReplyDeleteBread, yummy yummy bread
I can eat 1/2 a loaf warmed with butter and jelly or french toast. I to find myself fighting with my trigger foods.(found you from jenks blog)
I have been learning my trigger foods too since I've been on Weight Watchers for 20 weeks. My newest one was birthday cake. I BARELY have the willpower to leave it alone.
ReplyDeleteI think it's awesome that you're admitting to yourself what your addictions are and openly confronting the struggle you have with eating those foods. For me the addiction is not one food. I'm an emotional eater and when I enter binge mode, I will eat LITERALLY anything to binge. It's bad. I think by pinpointing your exact foods you'll have an easier time letting them go or only having them as occasional indulgences.
ReplyDelete