Tuesday, July 14, 2009
A ramble: Life as the Big girl.....
I will never put myself down. I know that there are thousands if not millions of people in the world lobbying for that position so I will be my head cheerleader instead. While cruising around the blogosphere I read some interesting points and started thinking. On this rode of life I have spent most if not all of it overweight so I have lots of experience in big girl life. This didn't happen after a crazy breakup (actually I tend to lose weight after break-ups), or after giving birth (I've never had that pleasure) it's just been a long process.
My mom was a generally healthy woman in her younger age. All five feet one inch of her was a high school basketball star, but my mom was never a skinny girl. I can't ever look at a picture of her and say, "Yeah that skinny woman is my mom". So the birth of her first and only child brought on a weight gain, but nothing that threw her off her pivot now she's just as healthy (weight-wise) as she was when she graduated in 1969. Now it's her 27 year old daughter she's worried about.
The only problem with that is I have never been worried. I never felt as though I didn't live a full, happy and productive life. I dated....great guys, and not-so-great guys. I learned, I laughed and had fun. I have never felt as if my life was any less than that of a girl that was a size six. As a matter of fact as a waitress I am one of the heaviest girls on our staff. I am one of the fastest and the most efficient. That has lead me to being one of the best servers in the restaurant, as well as taking a part-time management position. I surround myself with my size 4 employees all day and hear their insecurities that aren't too different from mine. Sure I have had my share of experiences that they'd never had. But no one's life is the same.
I have a great family, a cute apartment, a job, good friends, likes, dislikes, triumphs, and tragedies. No I have never worn a bikini, but I have one numerous pageants, no I have never had a boyfriend pick me up and spin me around, but I have had one profess their love with 100 pink, white, and red balloons. We all have different lives, but my size has never made mine any different. So whatever your size is know that when this life is over and you look back on how you have lived the perfect reaction should be..."dammit that was fun". So far that's how I feel and even though I'm in the process of making a far healthier me..the body I'm living this life in wouldn't be traded for the world.