Thursday's Inspirational words

“Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical.”
Sophia Loren quotes (Italian film Actress, b.1934)

Beautiful is not a size 4!

This isn't strictly about my weight loss efforts. As much as some of you come to view this blog strictly for that reason UNFORTUNATELY for you....I have a little more to talk about. I currently weigh 247.6 pounds. My goal is to weigh 180 pounds. *pauses while you all sit in shock and disbelief* My goals aren't to be thin. My goal is to be healthier. If after I reach that goal I decide that I need to lose more then GREAT! If not....oh well. You see my beauty has never been connected to my weight. Only my health and my ability to live my life with a little more ease. I always thought I was beautiful (not in an egotistical way).

Look at these women.

Are they not just ridiculously gorgeous and stunning?

This is what the world (media) considers to be fat! And since I weigh a significant amount more than these women where does that leave me? To the media I'm just a blob. A girl that PETA can make fun of

or that parents that would actually allow their children to point or stare at. Or the girl in high school who NEVER got a date because no one was willing to look past her weight and see that she was fun, gorgeous, outgoing, and brilliant. That's not who and what I am. That's what the media sees.


This is me. A woman who secretly (or not so secretly) aspires to be a model. Has never been boyfriend-less AGAINST my will. I have never allowed my weight to make me less of a person.....so the question to you is.....is it holding you back.....and why?

Relaxer day countdown and other hair issues....

I have already admitted that I am way too deep in over my head with this stretch. I am 20 weeks Post Relaxer! I'm sure it could have worked out great. However there were times when I wasn't caring for my hair at all. I see a lot of shedding, a little breakage, and some ends that seriously need to be whacked off! Well I'm happy to say I am self-relaxing Thursday evening. I'm kind of ancy about it, because I can count on one hand how many times I have relaxed my own hair, but it's time I put my hair care into my own hands (somewhat).

So I know my hair needs protein more than anything right now, especially pre-relaxer. So Monday night I pre-poo'ed with EVCO, and shampoo'ed with Aphogee Shampoo for Damaged Hair. Then I brought in some new found friends...

Motions Critical Protection & Repair Protein Reconstructor AND Vitale Olive Oil Leave-In conditioner with Pro-Vitamin B5
I applied my moisturizing leave-in (HE LTR) and air dried overnight! I feel such a big difference in my hair! It's softer, more manageable, and shedding is minimal. I am still a little shaky about the relaxer Thursday..even though I am excited. Any self- relaxing vixens wanna give me some advice?



So while on our Thanksgiving Eve date me and the E.B had many fun, light conversations, but one convo that has always come up in our one and a half year relationship is my hair. Well not so much my hair, but as you see above my UNDYING LOVE for wigs! He Hates it! Loathes it actually! With a feverish fiery passion. Weaves, wigs, extensions, and all! Basically if it didn't grow out of your head it's deemed pointless in his book and my train of thought is kinda reversed. We went in circles about this for 45 minutes...and then I caved in.

Friday morning I will go to the local beauty school and have my hair blow dried, flat ironed and under the watchful eye of their instructor.....trimmed! I'm doing this for a few reasons: a) to do a real growth check b) I'm scared to trim my own ends c) to try to get accustomed to my own hair again and d) so he will quit wig griping! Why put my hair in the hands of beauty school students you ask??? I'd prefer not to pay $40+ dollars for something that is pretty simple and fool-proof for those in that profession when I can get it done for a kick ass $15! Can't wait to show you all results. I expect it to not be too long due to bad maintenance on my part. I assume I will still be NL. I healthier NL, but NL nonetheless. Happy hair growing ladies!

Weigh-in

I can't say much about these numbers. They speak for themselves. I could give a plethora of excuses for it, but honestly I am kinda proud. In the midst of the holiday events I had a weight gain, but only a slight one....


Sorry for the glare. It reads at 247.6. Which is a .2 pound weight gain. I feel like I could have done a hell of a lot worse over the Thanksgiving weekend. I know where I messed up and I have picked up the pieces. We will keep it moving!

Yeah!!! The weekend is finally over!

Hello blogland! I hope all of you had boatfuls of family and shopping fun this weekend! I on the other hand had other things to do. Like work, work, work, and did I mention I worked a lot?! Moments like these I wish I had invested in a pedometer. I did about ten hours of restaurant managing, but I logged in about twenty-five hours of serving this weekend. When I say serving I don't mean I took a table here or there. I mean frantic non-stop flow of people will it ever stop serving. As I punched out of my final shift this week my computerized time card read 51.46 hours! Now time to prepare myself to do it all over again. Based upon my gladiator six day a week schedules I will have a day off this coming Friday! I guess I can't be really mad. I asked for this torture!

Anyway my eating habits have not been very good at all this past week. My super employee antics have me eating whatever I can when I can. That leads to quick, stuff in your mouth, convenient, not so healthy choices. Lots of fried crap, and very few fruits or veggies insight. Honestly I ate about 2 meals a day. Some of them were swallowed (yes swallowed, not eaten) within five minutes. I feel bad, because I KNOW that I knew in advance that this schedule and weekend were going to be ridiculous, so I could have put in more effort to plan my meals. Hmmm don't know if my activity outweighs my bad food choices or not. We'll see what the scale says Wednesday. Either way every meal is a new chance to make better choices! Stay healthy and Beautiful!

a life entry.......cuz love matters too!

Okay I flippin' lied! I said I would not be posting again this week, but I am..again...today! So sue me! I made a little special time to do so.....Well earlier I said I was going to spend quality time with a quality person. Well I had a play date today with my "estranged boyfriend". (You might remember him and our slightly chaotic/tumultuous relationship from the beginning months of my blog) Well he reappears today! We'll use the term estranged because.....dammit it just fits the situation. Anywho after some Food court chinese grub for me(which I totally forgot to take a pic of...sorry) and 1500 Sbarro's entrees on one damn tray (for him) we saw.....

PRECIOUS
Which was GREAT and worth every bit of buzz that came along with it! It stuck pretty close to the book though it could have done a bit more seeing that the book was only 120 pages! I got pretty damn close to crying my eyeballs out....but I didn't! And I am soo upset with my online community! As many times as this movie has came up on facebook and twitter no one was kind enough to tell me that my future husband/baby daddy/sugar daddy Lenny Kravitz had a role. Small role, but sexy *fans self* nonetheless!


Anyway back to the E.B. Spending time w/ my sweet pea was an absolute breath of fresh air. I hate to sound like a groupie or teenager, but honestly if I could spend 25 hours a day with him I would. We laugh, we bicker, and in so many ways I think we compliment each other to a T. The Heathcliff to my Claire, The George to my Weezy, and maybe even the James to my Florida Evans lol. He makes me love in news ways and my love for him....seems to never run out..it continues to grow, even when situations seem like they are destined for failure. He's a friend who I can tell all my stories too (even if he's heard them a million times). Who knows second, third, or fourth chances might be needed to get this thing right......because I love him enough to try
maybe we should stop trying to run with it....and just crawl.......This is for you sweet pea (ignore the tight jeans, nerd glasses, and Cassie w/ her semi-shaved head LOL) Seems like the perfect message from me to you......

Love, Your Princess

Weigh-In and other randomness

Happy Turkey day eve everyone! I'm sad to say this might be the last entry this week. My holiday will be spent working at a feverish pace, as I have requested to work six days a week until 2010! Today I'm headed out to spend a little quality time with a quality person (we'll discuss later). I expect another day off in seven days :(


First I'd like to give a big shout-out, high-five and thumbs up to my friends at Chobani! I won a case Chobani greek yogurt (honey flavored)! Which I am currently enjoying this morning w/ Bear Naked FIT in triple berry crunch. Delicious!



Any who on to my weigh-in. I must say I have tried really hard this week. The amount of fruits and veggies I have incorporated into my diet within the past seven days is.....(for lack of a better term) mind0blowing! My new favorite fall fruit is.....the mighty pomegranate and I am damn near addicted to roasted brussel sprouts and acorn squash. All those fruits and veggies helped me stay full longer. Thus eating far less which gave me his beaut to show the public....

sorry for the blurriness, I had to crop out my not too hot toes! Anyway it reads: 247.4! Which is down 1.3 pounds from last week! Ok it's not a staggering amount, but hey it took more than a week to put it on.....I assume it will take more than that to take it off!

Hope you all have a happy and safe Thanksgiving!